Life getting in the way of life. Where was the clause in the contract that said it was okay to bag out for long periods of time with a creative endeavor I’ve put a lot of effort into making happen? MIA.
I suppose I could invoke words like commitment and passion and purpose into the equation. But really, creating my blog and diligently posting to it is more about re-learning myself and my habits, testing the waters, and being irritated by the discomfort of cutting my creative teeth on this project. It’s a process. Not unlike the processes artists and makers work through in many forms of expression.
I’ve been immersed in producing a monthly publication driven by deadlines, tackling the communications for my environmental interests, wading through the dreaded income tax return crap, and fiddling around with all the everyday stuff with which most of us are caught up in.
But my failure to post also comes from the work I’m putting into defining my voice here and the direction I think is the truest expression of what I want to do. And, sometimes I just get bogged down in emotions and thoughts that sabotage me and trip me up. The “monkey mind,” the life circumstances that push my boat into the shoals. Do you ever experience these derailments? Fortunate person if you never do. Or maybe not. The detours often help us set our course. What I know is that I need to embrace my upheavals and the darker impulses like they’re friends.
So I’m glad you’re sticking with me through these growing pains. I’d love to hear your thoughts about your own experiences with your creative journey.
In this part of the world, the sublime season is welling up around us – filling up the bare branches with lime green, gold and rusty reds. Peepers are assembling their choirs, birds are amplifying their songs and battling over choice nesting real estate. Pollen is blowing off the pine trees in yellow clouds. The show of flowering trees has a short run, but it’s glorious while it lasts. Spring! I hope you’re finding pockets of joy in which to celebrate.